Whether you’re the bride, the planner, or a plus-one tagging along for the ride, bachelorette parties come with a lot of unspoken expectations. Who plans what? Are there rules? Can you wear white? (Short answer: if you’re not the bride, probably not.)
To keep the good vibes rolling and the drama minimal, here’s a no-nonsense guide to everything you should know about bachelorette party etiquette—before the group chat explodes or someone starts rage-texting from the airport.
Who Plans the Bachelorette Party?
Traditionally, the maid of honor leads the charge—but these days, it’s often a team effort. Bridesmaids, close friends, or even the bride herself might take the reins depending on personalities and schedules.
Some groups split tasks up: one person handles lodging, another books activities, and someone else wrangles the cat herd that is a group of adults trying to sync calendars.
The key here is communication. Ask the bride what she wants (and doesn’t want), get a sense of budget, and then start planning early enough that no one is panic-booking a flight at 2 a.m. the night before.
Setting Expectations With the Bride
Bachelorette parties should be fun, not stressful. But that only happens if the bride makes her preferences known. Not every bride wants a club crawl or a Magic Mike situation. Some just want a chill beach day, a wine tasting, or even a weekend in watching rom-coms and doing face masks.
If you’re the bride, speak up about your vision, comfort zones, and budget expectations. If you’re planning, don’t assume—you’re not a mind reader. Ask.
Guest List and Invitations
The invite list usually includes bridesmaids and close friends, but it doesn’t have to stop there. Cousins, coworkers, childhood besties—they can all be included if the bride wants them there. What matters is the vibe: mix people who will mesh well together.
Formal invites aren’t required. A group message or email thread usually does the job. But don’t skip clarity—send details early and include the essentials: dates, location, cost estimates, and what’s expected (yes, even attire).
Do You Have to Attend Every Event?
Nope. Life is real, and not everyone can take off four days, fly across the country, or shell out for spa treatments and $16 cocktails. If you’re invited and can’t afford or swing the full experience, talk to the group.
Often you can join for part of it—just the dinner, just one night, or even just send a sweet note or small gift.
What’s not okay? Ghosting. RSVP clearly and early so the group can plan accordingly.
What to Wear (and What Not to)
The vibe and location will drive the dress code, but one rule tends to hold: don’t wear white unless the bride says it’s a theme or gives the green light. Aside from that, comfort and coordination usually win.
Many groups do themes (Barbiecore, Y2K, cowgirl disco—you name it). You don’t have to participate, but a little effort goes a long way. If you’re unsure, ask. And definitely pack a backup outfit in case plans change last-minute.
Gifts and Games
Gifts for the bride at the bachelorette party are optional. Some guests chip in for something fun or meaningful—like a custom robe, lingerie, or a small keepsake. It’s more about the moment than the item.
Games are common, but they should match the bride’s personality. If she loves cheeky dares or party games, go for it. If she’s more low-key, maybe skip the public scavenger hunt. The goal is making her feel celebrated—not uncomfortable.
Drinking, Boundaries, and Behavior
This one should be obvious but needs saying anyway: know your limits. If alcohol is involved, pace yourself. You don’t want to be the reason someone’s crying in a bathroom stall—or worse, calling an Uber before dinner even starts.
Consent, comfort, and respect matter. Not everyone drinks, dances, or does tequila shots on a Tuesday. Let everyone participate in their own way without judgment or peer pressure. A good time isn’t about being wild—it’s about making memories.
Handling Awkward Money Situations
Read more at https://sweetsundayevents.com/bachelorette-party-expenses/Money stuff is where things get messy fast. The best way to avoid it? Transparency. Splitwise or Venmo-friendly spreadsheets are your friends. Plan a general budget before booking anything and keep everyone looped in.
If you’re organizing, don’t spring surprise costs on the group. And if someone can’t afford everything, be kind. Flexibility is better than losing a friendship over a brunch bill.
The Post-Party Thank You
Whoever did the organizing deserves a thank you—especially if they juggled logistics, group moods, and that one person who never answers texts. A thoughtful message, card, or small gift is always appreciated.
And brides, even if your crew insisted on treating you all weekend, a heartfelt thank you goes a long way. It’s not just about the trip—it’s about the people who showed up for you.
Making It Fun Without Losing the Plot
Etiquette isn’t about being uptight—it’s about creating an experience everyone actually enjoys.
Every bachelorette party will look a little different. Some are wild. Some are mellow. Some are in matching pink wigs riding a party bus at 2 a.m. in Nashville. Some are backyard wine nights with charcuterie and Taylor Swift playlists.
What matters is that it reflects the bride and respects the people who are there to celebrate her. Be thoughtful. Be flexible. And for the love of group harmony—answer the group chat.